I Heard They SUCK Live! — by Mike Richardson

Posted: 11:27 pm, December 5, 2013 by Mike Richardson

Lordi live at The Picture house, Edinburgh. Lordi made history in 2006 by winning the 2006 Eurovision Song Contest with a then record 292 points, becoming the first Finnish performer to win the contest. LORDI is: Mr. Lordi (vocals), Amen (guitar, vocals), OX (bass, vocals), Kita (drums, vocals), and Awa (keyboards, vocals). 9 May 2013 Picture: Alan Rennie

“Medio-core, It’s not forsaken
The music they’re makin’
Will leave you with a feeling of indifference
How was the band?
They were okay, not great, but pretty good
They played the songs I knew they would
Some old, some new
The same formula stays true
We can concur, it’s mediocre” - Medio-Core by NOFX

November has been one hell of a busy month concert-wise and unfortunately that means December is going to be quiet. It is typical, with a lot of bands not wanting to tour in the winter and certainly not around the holidays, but it makes for a break in the action that just doesn’t sound fun. I was going to recommend the Motörhead concert, but it was cancelled due to Lemmy getting a pacemaker.

This month, if you’re desperate, I have three options that are in Munich. On the upside, one of the most exciting festivals of the year will be held down in Innsbruck on December 13-14th that definitely will not disappoint! I’ll start with the local concerts first.

The Meteors will be playing at the Backstage Halle on December 7th. If you sort of like the Cramps, but wish they’d go a bit harder and punk, then you’ve got The Meteors. In my opinion, they’re the best psychobilly band around, although I typically rank psychobilly in the unlistenable category. With over 30 albums to their name, if you want to prepare for the show you’ve got a lot of listening to do. The band has been around since 1980 and has released an album nearly every year.

Lordi, the infamous Eurovision song contest winners of 2006, will be playing the Backstage Werk. I’m sure if you ask angrily they will perform “Hard Rock Hallelujah” for you. Personally I’m going to skip this one as really they’re just a GWAR rip-off gone pop. However, it still could be fun. Lordi plays on December 13th.

Peter and the Test Tube Babies — Wiki Commons

Finally, Peter & The Test Tube Babies are doing their annual German pilgrimage. I both love and hate Peter & The Test Tube Babies as I’ve seen them rock and I’ve seen them suck. The last time I saw them was a couple of years ago when they were on stage a total of less than 50 minutes and that includes talking, tuning, etc. As a headliner who charges €18, I expect over 45 minutes of music. If they hadn’t been so good the years before I would have been really pissed about the show, but it happens. Peter and the Test Tube Babies play at the Backstage Halle on December 19th.

The highlight of every December, however, is the Monster Zero Mash down in Innsbruck. Every year bands from all across Europe gather to play in a small bar in Austria with seemingly no locals there at all. It’s a celebration of the record label Monster Zero, but also of all things “Ramones core.” If you like the Ramones, you’ll love this festival. This year the lineup takes in bands from Holland (where the

Monster Zero Mash in Innsbruck - munichFOTO

record label was founded), Italy, England, Austria, Spain, Germany, Belgium, and France. Two days and twelve bands for €15 and only a couple hours drive away, you really can’t go wrong with this one. The Monster Zero Mash is at the PMK in Innsbruck on December 13th and 14th. More info at: https://www.facebook.com/MonsterZeroPunkrock

Until next time, I’ll see you in the pit.